Jade’s story

I’m Jade. I’m 22 years old and live in Norwich.

It was during my second year at the University of East Anglia, that I first thought about getting assessed for autism. I was studying psychology and doing well, but my tutors said I often misunderstood questions, and this made me lose marks. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t figure out how to improve from a 2:1 to a First grade. It was frustrating.

By the end of my second year, I felt stuck. I knew I could do better, but something was stopping me. My lecturer referred me to the university’s Specific Learning Disability (SpLD) team for tests. They checked for dyslexia, autism, ADHD, and other learning differences. The results showed I needed support. I got help with time management and understanding questions. At first, I wasn’t sure it would make a difference, but my grades improved, and I started getting firsts. The extra support was working.

Getting a Formal Diagnosis

In my final year, I realised I wouldn’t have the same support at work, or in further education. So, I decided to get a formal assessment for autism.

In June 2024, I went to my GP. I was worried they wouldn’t believe me because I had always done well in school. My university therapist was a good sounding board and helped me look at my childhood for signs of autism. I brought a folder of notes to my appointment, but the GP didn’t look at them. Instead, they gave me a questionnaire. I filled it out right away. Soon after, my GP confirmed my referral.

By October, Autism Anglia contacted me. My biggest fear was that they would say I wasn’t autistic. If that happened, why did I find life so challenging?

The assessment included online forms, a face-to-face ADOS assessment, and another meeting which my parents came to. Two hours after my final appointment, I got a phone call—I was autistic. They said my full report would take six weeks, but I was pleasantly surprised when I got it in two weeks.

Understanding My Diagnosis

My report was very detailed and personalised to me. It said I had Level 2 support needs, which surprised me. I thought I would be Level 1. It made me realise I had spent years struggling without knowing why. Suddenly, a lot of things started to make sense.

Comparing my report with a friend’s, I saw hers was short and generic. Mine was full of detail—even including a section about sharks, my special interest. It gave me links to learn more about sharks and other animals, which was a lovely touch.

The Autism Anglia team was amazing. They explained everything well, helped my mum understand, and made me feel comfortable. They also found signs of ADHD and delayed auditory processing disorder. I can follow up on these later if I want to.

Looking at My Past

My diagnosis helped me understand my childhood.

I didn’t grow up in a typical way—my dad has Tourette’s Syndrome, and people often thought I was ‘weird.’ I was loud, struggled with boundaries, and didn’t know how to say no.

I was bullied from primary school to university. Sometimes, people were nice when they needed my help but turned on me later. I found these changes confusing and hurtful.

From a young age, I felt I had to hide my true self to fit in. I was always told, “Jade, be quiet,” or “Jade, you’re too much.” I changed to please others, but now I’m learning to be myself again.

During my autism assessment, I remembered something from when I was six years old —I asked myself if my family actually liked me. Talking about this with my parents was emotional, but it helped us understand each other better. The Autism Anglia team created a safe and comfortable space for us to be vulnerable with each other.

Sharing My Diagnosis

Since getting the diagnosis I have a much better relationship with myself.

I’ve told my family, friends, and employer about my diagnosis. I work as an Assistant Psychologist and my manager has been very supportive. They read my report and helped my colleagues understand me. I find small talk hard and initiating conversations with new people can be challenging. During my induction, my manager arranged for my coworkers to drop in and introduce themselves, instead of me having to initiate conversations. These small changes help a lot.

I love psychology, it’s another special interest of mine, so it’s wonderful to be able work in this field. I can now see that my passion can come across as pushy, so sharing my diagnosis with work colleagues has helped them understand me better.

Moving Forward

Before my diagnosis, I struggled with anxiety and depression. Now, I understand my triggers and can be kinder to myself. I still mask at work sometimes, but I feel more relaxed at home. My relationship with my boyfriend is also better—he now knows the real me.

At first, I was angry that no one noticed my struggles earlier. But autism awareness was different when I was younger, and I was good at hiding my challenges.

Sometimes, I still feel frustrated, but I don’t let it hold me back.

Encouraging Others to Get Support

Seeing how much my diagnosis helped me, I want others to get the support they need.

If you think you might be autistic or have ADHD, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Even if the assessments show you’re not autistic, experts can guide you to the right support.